Tag Archives: love

Lingering

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It’s been a while, and lots of things have happened, for all I know I’ve confessed to a boy, and more, but for now he just wants to be friends, even though he doesn’t act like it. So have this poem, lingering, in my eyes towards him.

Lingering

What if every time I get closer I get pushed away,
I know the words, yet I am too afraid to say.
My comments kept inside me all along
Just one note away from singing the correct song.

Somethings get closer than what we will be for real
It’s a thing I don’t want to feel.
This is just about you and me I know
But I don’t know if what you do is real or for show.

I’m afraid to ask it again, but also to stay away
There are so many reasons why I should stay.
I have been enlightened with a cheer in my heart
No experience, but an even braver heart.

So, I continue to wait and see
Hoping that friendship will become more, and I become we.

I’m actually me

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It’s been a while, but I think I’m back to being me. it sounds odd in some way, but I wasn’t really being me, but merely reflecting an image of myself, not telling anyone except that boy.

Imagine that you just don’t know what to feel anymore, or how to live, or what to do. It feels as if you lost a part of yourself. But hey, in some way you did, bu it is time to investigate again what self now actually means, or what it doesn’t mean.

Over the past half year, I’ve cried, I’ve lost, I’ve learnt, and I am so much closer to knowing what my values are, and more importantly, what friendship means to me. It’s quite odd in some kind of way, since this was a chain reaction tied to one person.

Both the bad and the good were linked back to that boy. I have to thank him, even though Id on’t know how I could ever make clear what he taught me. At the same time I don’t need to know either, but knowing I have a friend like that, a person who just respects me for who I am, that’s great actually.

So thank you, if you’re ever reading this, person, code name ”
Cthulhu”, thank you for finding myself once more.

~Roza~

Quest

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On the quest towards a meal for a home
the knight for a mighty throne.
A dragon unslain habiting the castle
something for the knight, yet quite a hassle.

“Oh, old can of Iron Glory,
Willt Du defeat me, or die in glory?”

The dragon almighty, yet kind
spun a wheel, and pressed rewind.
A knight, no longer in his eye,
only a dying man, laughing by.

“Forgive me Dragon, Du hast won,
please send my regards to my wife and my young.”

One moment it happened the next it was gone,
the dragon had slain himself for what he had become.

“Go back in your time, oh knight almighty.
Remember those you love, people like you and me.”

The knight found the rewinder, and so it began,
a new adventure, and more than one.
Never hoping, dreaming to yet be,
the dragon’s words he carried, to places yet to see.

Love

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Yes, I know, I’ve been told to move on., there is no way it can become something between you and I, yet still I long for you. You told me, it wouldn’t be happening, and I am to respect that, which I am. Distance is such a big issue I guess.

But that doesn’t mean I can just let you go, and honestly I tried. I tried to kick you out of my mind, I try to be just friends, I’ve tried for a good 4-5 months already and I’m still stuck at the beginning. But at the same time, I’m also not stuck there, since I just don’t feel anything.

Yes I feel joy and laughter, but I tend to block out the feelings surrounding you. I know sometimes it goes well, but in the moments my mind wanders towards you, and I remember when you kissed me, before we departed. It flows back into my mind as if it was yesterday, but it’s been so long, and so far.

I get stronger from it though, the times I think about you, even though my mind tells me I shouldn’t, I still do. And I don’t know if I will ever stop wondering how it would be to embrace you again, just to feel your body pressed to mine in a tight hug, so I wonder, and wait till we meet again, my friend.

I am not on my own

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I’m not on my own
I’m not on my own
I am stronger than you are
I’m not on my own
I can fight the whole world
I am not on my own
I am not on my own
I am following the wind
I am not on my own
I’m the flowing water ashore
I’m not on my own
I am not alone
I am not forgetting I’m here
I am not alone
I am definitely strong
I am so much more
I am who I am
I am what I say
I define who I am
I figure out what is right
I’m not on my own
I’m not on my own
and never will be.

One thought in an ocean of things, after I finally had to curious to speak up to my friend about something big.